拾乐园 Paradise Found  
#35  《柳浪》- 王维             Go Back
Separated in rows, the lovely trees stand one next to another,
Their inverted reflections cast in the clear ripples.
They do not take after the willows by the palace moat,
Which grieve at parting in spring wind.
这样比较准确吧……
        

#34  Re: 《柳浪》- 王维             Go Back
我脑袋慢,时间又不够用。 我只是想 go at a slower pace. 但愿没有冒犯自娱君。
非常欣赏自娱君的才华,学到不少。 多谢!

凑兴: ( 杂树, 自娱君译作“the trees galore”,非常贴切。)

《北垞》--王维

北垞湖水北,
杂树映朱阑。
逶迤南川水,
明灭青林端。

North Hill
by Wang Wei

North Hill sits north of the lake clear and sheen
Amidst varied trees red railings shine bright
Meandering through the woods deep and green
South River glistens in and out of sight

Tr. Yuntian


Last modified on 03/13/16 20:19
        

#33  Re: 《柳浪》- 王维             Go Back
自娱君,我第一句的"row by row" 是借用你的美译。跟在你后面译当然容易多了。 :)

yes, by the royal moat, 为了凑音节, 我没有加“the". 哦,忘了可以写成 th'.

我的拙译离”perfect" 远着呢。 就是译着玩。谢鼓励。:)



自娱自乐 wrote: (3/10/2016 0:38)
靠近?那上下最好不过了,

Try:

Those by (the) Royal moat O don't follow,
Whose twigs cry...blah...blah...

Hahaha, well, just kidding, hahaha, yours looks perfect to me:))



Last modified on 03/13/16 19:31
        

#32  Re: 《柳浪》- 王维             Go Back
Forever Young

May God bless and keep you always
May your wishes all come true
May you always do for others
And let others do for you
May you build a ladder to the stars
And climb on every rung
May you stay forever young
Forever young, forever young
May you stay forever young.

....



Forever Young by JOAN BAEZ





自娱自乐 wrote: (3/10/2016 1:19)
云天君,想想其实很简单 就是 forever young you will stay ...

        

#31  Re: 《柳浪》- 王维             Go Back
朱阑 --- 朱栏?


辋川集 (王维)/南垞

轻舟南垞去,北垞淼难即。
隔浦望人家,遥遥不相识。




自娱自乐 wrote: (3/10/2016 17:51)
《北垞》- 王维

北垞湖水北,
杂树映朱阑。
逶迤南川水,
明灭青林端。

。。。



Last modified on 03/13/16 01:15
        

#30  Re: 《柳浪》- 王维             Go Back
Beautiful!



自娱自乐 wrote: (3/10/2016 1:35)
If thou dost drink that Gold Stream every day,
Oh forever young thou wilt stay.
Astride a dragon with feathers in hand
To Jade King a green Phoenix leadeth thy way.

        

#29  Re: 《柳浪》- 王维             Go Back
wow, 去纽约啊。 祝令尊令堂身体安康! 祝自娱君一路顺风! 远握!


另外几首,我晚些再来回。
        

#28  Re: 《柳浪》- 王维             Go Back
好的,细水长流。我也要准备休假去纽约看望年老父母了,所以也准备网休一段时间。深深问候,远握!
        

#27  Re: 《柳浪》- 王维             Go Back
实在跟不上自娱君的速度。

这段时间上网太多。 以后还是一周上网一到两次。细水长流。 不然我很快会戒网。 请自娱君见谅。


Last modified on 03/11/16 00:55
        

#26  Re: 《柳浪》- 王维             Go Back
我就是从这句变的。 这样更好。



自娱自乐 wrote: (3/10/2016 1:19)
云天君,想想其实很简单 就是 forever young you will stay ...

        

#25  《柳浪》- 王维             Go Back
《北垞》- 王维

北垞湖水北,
杂树映朱阑。
逶迤南川水,
明灭青林端。

A Quatrain By Wang Wei
(The North Hill)

The north hill stands on the north shore,
Where th’ red shrubs hedge the trees galore.
The South Stream’s winding the green woods,
Lo, it’s gone, O, there it makes for.

Tr. Ziyuzile
        

#24  《柳浪》- 王维             Go Back
If thou dost drink that Gold Stream every day,
Oh forever young thou wilt stay.
Astride a dragon with feathers in hand
To Jade King a green Phoenix leadeth thy way.
        

#23  《柳浪》- 王维             Go Back
云天君,想想其实很简单 就是 forever young you will stay ...
        

#22  Re: 《柳浪》- 王维             Go Back
个人感觉 logevity 似乎沾点仙气,哈哈哈,of course, alive is good!
        

#21  Re: 《柳浪》- 王维             Go Back
靠近?那上下最好不过了,

Try:

Those by (the) Royal moat O don't follow,
Whose twigs cry...blah...blah...

Hahaha, well, just kidding, hahaha, yours looks perfect to me:))
        

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